Moving down to South Congress has been a shot in the arm for my hobbies. I've been steadily improving my drinking now that I don't have to drive downtown. The bus is a great alternative and at only 50 cents leaves room in the budget for another martini. I've been hacking the main frame in style with my sweet computer setup. I have to admit, conjuring Haratio was completely new to me but I was pretty good at that too. Last but not least, I've rediscovered my love for tennis thanks to the abundance of tennis courts that are... down south.
Tennis was my biggest sport when I was growing up. I never played competitively but we did watch tennis on tv a whole lot. I remember when Agassi had all his hair and his backhand was crazy. Jimmy Conners was too old for everyone by this point and he was on his way out. Pete Sampras was the cat's pajamas and he won Wimbledon about a billion times. Monica Seles started her grunting thing and everyone started complaining about it and then somebody
stabbed her. Back then you didn't have sexy female tennis players and Wilson and Penn were about the only brands anybody ever heard of. The fast serves at the time were like 120 mph or something. Snap back to reality and now we have Federer who never loses. Mcenroe is calling games and he's still as nuts as ever. Agassi just retired and if you aren't serving at 140 mph then you suck.
The newest up-and-comer is a little bit of a mystery to most people. Ryan "the black knight" Mustard is taking the tennis world by storm. Starting out his career at Fulmore middle school, he gained notoriety by dominating his opponents in singles and doubles matches. His style is inventive yet classical and he brings an alternative mentality to the game that serves to intimidate his opponents and energize his fanbase.
Bryce is Ryan's biggest fan at the moment. The grandfather and unconfirmed bum declares, "I like to laugh!" Bryce was hooting and hollering at the absolute smothering the "black knight" was dishing out. "Get him! Put him away! Make him run!" yelled Bryce to keep the energy level up as the match wore on. "He just came out of nowhere and started watching us play tennis. I think he was smoking a joint too," said Ryan when asked how much impact the fans had on his victory tonight. It's a great time to be involved in the tennis world. With Nike, Maria Sharipova and players like Ryan Mustard, tennis is definitely the new black.
It wasn't actually today, but recently I had a very good day on the internet. I decided that all you noobs need a lesson on navigating the information super highway. After all it is a series of tubes.
